Diaper rash

The hypocrisy of The Left never ceases to amaze me. Ever since the phone number of Senator David Vitter appeared on the client records of the DC madam, moonbat bloggers have been making nonstop political hay out of the rumors that he may have donned a diaper and filled it with his homemade chocolat. In the twisted world of The Left, this somehow qualifies as "hypocrisy, " which is only a big deal if you're a white male Republican. You're not going to hear one word of judgment about it out of the mouths of our liberals friends, but America is just filled with people dying to shit their pants:

Sometimes, you can’t stop your weight-loss secrets from leaking out.

Dieters have been flocking to drugstores to pick up Alli, the first over-the-counter weight-loss pill to be approved by the Food and Drug Administration, despite the scary warning: Stray too far from your low-fat diet and you just might poop your pants.

The drug’s maker, GlaxoSmithKline, has been up front about the pill’s side effects, suggesting that first timers wear dark pants or bring a change of clothes to work until they get used to the diet pill’s potentially yucky consequences.

I'd like to point out that while this article goes to great lengths not to identify the gender of these incontinence enthusiasts (much in the same way MSM doesn't identify terrorists as Muslims), the two named Alli users are both women. That, plus the fact that more women go on diets than do men, leads me to believe that it is feminists(!!!) who are coordinating this attack on Senator Vitter, as well as orchestrating this campaign of silence about their own scatological predilections. The tragic consequences of this are twofold: Not only will another Christian white male be ritually sacrificed to the pagan gods of The Left, but the media hoopla will be unfairly focused on Mr. Vitter's alleged indiscretions, allowing feminists and their fellow conspirators to escape any scrutiny whatsoever and continue to brainwash our daughters into their pants-soiling ideology. These are dark days for us conservative bloggers, but rest assured I will continue to devote all my coffee breaks to fighting for the Righteous cause of Senator Vitter. Praise Him!