Attempted coup: Minneapolis

Larry Craig wants you to know that he is totally 100 percent crazy for teh pussy.

Take heart, those of you who fear that radical homosexual activists were able to recruit a sitting member of the United States Senate into their perverted lifestyle. Larry Craig has gone on the record, emphatically stating that penis will never touch his thin, reptilian lips:

Sen. Larry Craig, the Idaho Republican who pleaded guilty earlier this month to disorderly conduct after his arrest earlier this month on suspicion of lewd behavior in a Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport bathroom, issued a statement today saying he was innocent.

"I am not gay," he said twice during a 10-minute statement. "I did nothing wrong at the Minneapolis airport and I regret the decision to plead guilty."

Deliberately obscured by The Left's predictable cries of "hypocrisy" in this tragedy is one key fact: Liberals would never have been able to nearly seduce him into this debased life of Pottery Barn shopping and tearoom sex were it not for the infernal gayifying powers of the MSM.

Craig said he "overreacted" to the arrest by not consulting with counsel or family, in hopes of "making it go away." And he blamed his state of mind on the Idaho Statesman, the state's leading newspaper, which he said for eight months had "relentlessly and viciously harassed" him and his family. "Let me be clear," he said. "I am not gay and never have been."

In an editorial this morning, the Statesman called on Craig, who has been in Washington for 27 years, to "speak candidly with the people who have hired him for more than a quarter of a century." A headline on the front page read, "Men's room arrest reopens questions about Sen. Larry Craig," and the article included his denials in a 1982 congressional page scandal. Calling the paper's campaign "a witch hunt," Craig said the paper's investigation had fueled unfounded rumors in Idaho about his sexual orientation.

This is sexual abuse of the worst sort -- liberals, feminists, and other members of the professional victim caste, where is your Outrage? Call the most ardent heterosexual a homo long enough and eventually he succumbs to the label. It's a self-fulfilling prophesy, and one that seems to exclusively afflict Republicans. I only hope that noted lady's men David Dreier and Ken Mehlman share the same resolve as Senator Craig and can similarly avoid such a horrid fate. Praise Him!