Strategery

Ho-hum, The Left is hyperventilating yet again over some alleged improprieties among Department of Homeland Security officials and their freedom-loving consorts. Here's a small sampling of their feigned indignation: "It's the child molestation, stupid," "Doesn't anyone vet these people?" & "Family values -- harrumph!" -- yawn.

Sadly, our liberal friends are too excited with playing their infantile game of "gotcha!" to see this for what it truly is: a lethal blow against Islamofascism. What you are witnessing, moonbats, is a brilliant preemptive strike on the part of President Bush's Department of Homeland Security, an idea so masterful I have every confidence President Bush came up with it himself. However, recognizing it as such would require that you traitors drop your usual shrill demagoguery and step back to take a look at the larger picture. By robbing suicide bombers of their promised heavenly virgins by deflowering them here on earth, DHS is thereby decreasing the incentive to wage jihad, and effectively paving the way for the Christianization Democratization of the entire Middle East. Could this be any more obvious?

Christians, it is essential that you fulfill your obligations as citizens of Our Great Nation and bring your comely daughters of virtue true to the nearest Homeland Security branch. Rest assured, the patriots at DHS will do the rest. Praise Him!