Fragrance of The Beast

Hello, Christians -- if this didn't strike me as such a startling development, I would have waited until my next Glamourgeddon countdown. However, since this seems to drastically effect the Rapture Index, I felt I owed it to all of you. Please make sure you've scheduled your hair & nail appontments in time for Judgment Day, which is rapidly hurtling towards us... possibly even next week. The evidence? Rock band KISS, not content profaning makeup in their quest to lead America's teens to Satan, have announced their own line of fragrances:

KISS, the flamboyant '70s “rock and roll all night, and party every day” band best known for its on-stage pyrotechnics and colorful make-up, this fall hopes to fire up fans with a beauty and fragrance collection via Gemini Cosmetics, New York. KISS's longtime merchandise and licensing representatives, Signatures Network and Doc McGhee management, brokered the deal.

Increase Rapture Index by 25, and brace yourselves. (By the way, there's still time to order my rapture panties with the expedited shipping option.) Praise Him!