Edicts of Nancy

The blogosphere's most persecuted Christian!

Thursday, April 27, 2006

A Catholic education

The rugged good looks of Catholic League president Bill Donohue are enough to make me wish I were an altar boy. And the stamina he displays in continuously railing against the evil forces of secularism has me convinced he must be taking some sort of spiritual Viagra that allows him to maintain his Outrage all night long. Let's just hope for Christendom's sake that some moonbat pharmacist doesn't refuse to dispense this magic blue pill because it violates his "religious beliefs," because liberals, as they love pointing out, don't have any.

Only this month, our heartthrob Bill has taken to task the Green Party, Howard Dean, and The Left's War on Easter for their ceaseless attacks on God's One True Faith. The latest band of sinners to be deservingly smote by his terrible, swift sword is the University of Oregon paper Insurgent:
“The March edition of the Insurgent, a University of Oregon student newspaper, was one of the most obscene assaults on Christianity I have ever seen. To make sure that the persons I wrote to understand how vile this attack was, I sent a photocopy of the two most offensive graphics: one was a depiction of a naked Jesus on the Cross with an erection; the other, titled ‘Resurrection,’ showed a naked Jesus kissing another naked man, both sporting erections.

“The pictures are only one small part of the March edition. Indeed, the entire issue is replete with the most egregious examples of hate speech targeted at Christians. For example, there are several cartoons of Jesus—including Jesus crucified—that are so gratuitously offensive that only the most depraved would defend them. Moreover, the two opinion pieces against Catholicism are patently malicious. That all of this appeared in a student newspaper, during Lent, on the campus of a state institution, makes one wonder what is going on at the University of Oregon.

“This explosion of hate speech was a response to a decision reached by one of the Insurgent’s rivals, the Commentator, to publish the 12 Danish cartoons that recently so inflamed the Muslim world. An Insurgent editorial said that because the Commentator published depictions of Muhammad so as to ‘provoke dialogue,’ they had a right to thrash Christians as a way of provoking dialogue.
I agree with Bill. It is clearly an Outrage for Our Faith to be assaulted by The Left like this, and it marks a new low in the craven depths they'll sink to. After all, if any faith deserves this sort of mockery, it's clearly those anal sex-loving Jews who are running Hollywood. Praise Him!


  • At April 27, 2006 8:26 PM, Blogger jeffperado said…

    Well, I will have to give you credit for not rioting, like the muslims did over that cartoon depicting Muhammad. Although, I fail to see much difference in the outrage, as I would guess that you would riot...

    My advice, do what Fundamental Christians told the Muslims to do, chill.

    People have a right to say, publish and depict what they want. It is known as free speech, and is one of the inalienable rights granted us.

    So, until Christians take away all rights to free speech, quit being so offended at someone making fun of your leader.

  • At April 27, 2006 8:29 PM, Blogger jeffperado said…

    Sorry, I forgot that this was parody. Consider that a bit of realism in an otherwise silly, Monty Pytonesque barrage of useless trollop.

  • At April 28, 2006 9:15 AM, Blogger Brian FInch said…

    Praise him! I feel the muslim pain when I hear of these unholy erections!

    It's no wonder we have had to be subjected to Brokeback Mountain, it all makes sense now, it's the up-the-butt-lov'in Jews!

    Really, the only thing that upset me in that movie was having to watch cowboys. If it were a couple of cops it would have been so much hotter.

    Thank you Sister Nancy for showing me the way. The only that compares is a good porn flick and freshly chilled poppers.

  • At April 28, 2006 1:25 PM, Blogger jeffperado said…

    Shouldn't there be a 'teabagging' joke in here somewhere?


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