Tears in our beers

Ever since Barack Hussein Obama was "elected" as the grand Caliph of Our Nation, Americans have had to find new ways to cope with the loss of our most precious Freedoms. While some Christians might find solace from Obama's despotism by boning a stripper in a South Carolina graveyard, sadly, one of the more prevalent methods has become problem drinking:

In a setting a tad less formal, with no president or national press on hand, the Harvard professor and the Cambridge cop at the heart of last summer’s White House “beer summit” met for a second round - this time, at a local pub.

Henry Louis Gates Jr. and Sgt. James Crowley met for drinks Wednesday at River Gods, a popular River Street bar outside Central Square, not far from where their lives first intersected.

Sister Nancy Beth shares their despair, and while she doesn't approve of abusing alcohol to lessen the pain of living under the tyrannical regime of The One, it certainly does explain a lot, doesn't it?

Tragically, I can't help but think that this is part of The Left's master plan. Not only are they driving us to drink, but now they're making even more powerful consciousness-altering substances available. In a recent speech to America's school children, "President" Obama announced that "medical" marijuana would soon be dispensed from campus vending machines; he signed off his address by saying "Far out, man."

It is my fervent Prayer that America will once again embrace its Christian heritage and elect white people whose Values are uncompromised by the stain of drugs and alcohol, like George Bush & Dick Cheney. Only then can we hope to return to a position of preeminent Moral leadership in the world. Praise Him!

White pearls, Black rage

While reputable journalists have spent the past week feverishly trying to avoid another 9/11 by deciphering the terrorist hand signals the Obamas flashed to the Muslim world, one aspect of their shameful displays of treason has been largely ignored: Michelle X Obama's questionable choice in jewelry. While there has been some discussion of her baubles of mass destruction, it's been largely relegated to the style section of the newspaper, further proof of MSM's complicity in abetting their Nubian Messiah's attempt to steal the White House. Rather than being a chic declaration of fashion independence, Ms. Obama's seditious necklace is further evidence of her deep hatred for white people and the latest gaffe that threatens to blow the cover off her hostility towards Our Nation, because those pearls are just as fake as her patriotism:

“Power pearls,” are what Jack Lynch, a wholesaler at Sea Hunt Pearls in San Francisco, Calif., calls the gobstopper-sized pearls that Michelle Obama favors. (The nickname comes from the big marble-sized candies also known as "jawbreakers.") Women who wear these mean business.

Gobstopper-sized pearls are favored by powerful women like Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, and Senator Dianne Feinstein, says Betty Sue King, a wholesaler at King’s Ransom in Sausalito, Calif. The irony is that “power pearls” connote wealth and power, but the larger ones may actually be fakes! ...

Now we didn’t get up close and personal enough to bite the pearls to tell if they’re fake — if they’re fake they feel smooth, if they’re real they feel gritty — but fashion watchers are speculating that they are indeed of the faux variety. “They’re imitation!” says Alcindor. “I don’t think they’re real.” The Times and U.K.'s The Guardian agree. The Guardian theorizes that fake pearls let her evoke the Kennedy era “without detracting from the messages about her humble origins and feet-on-the-ground family life which play so well with voters.”

As a hard-working American, I find all this evocation of the Kennedy era (e.g. "Camelot with a tan") a bit hard to swallow, since the Kennedys were, at the very least, Christian, even if they didn't act like it. Also, they were born in America, or at least what used to be. Just what kind of bait-and-switch operation is The Left trying to pull here?

What's more troubling is that Ms. Obama's counterfeit pearls only amplify the sense of deception surrounding the Obama campaign, whether it's Barack Hussein's elusive birth certificate (finally revealed, here), or his trumpeting of anti-Semitism on his website. After all, it's only one small step from this: to this:
The Obamas and their supporters in the liberal media and blogosphere have been allowed to let this charade to go on long enough. It's time that we Christians take a more assertive roll and quit letting the Black Muslim Homosexual lobby walk all over us. I urge you to use the power of the internets to expose all the liberals' jewelry-based treacheries, whether it's missing flag lapel pins or these pearls practically strung by Mohammed himself. Only then can we hope to see Our Nation return to the Values and jewelry that made America great. Praise Him!

Not so sweet Caroline

Sorry for the gap in blogging on this end, Christians. The Left gave me anthrax -- again -- and it was only through the power of Prayer and the finest over-the-counter cold medicines Western medicine has to offer that I was able to claw my way back from the brink of certain death and stand before my would-be assassins: J'accuse, moonbats! It's time you once again feel the sting of my wrath, made ever so much keener by my maximum dosage of Dayquil.

If there's anything more ridiculous than the political endorsements of liberal Hollywood celebrities, it's the endorsements of their pampered offspring. Somewhere between their stints in rehab and bearing the illegitimate children of the bandmembers of Good Charlotte, they want you to know that they've given serious thought to which of the traitors on the Democratic slate will best pervert Our Nation's Values. One prominent celebuspawn has given her thumbs-up to the celebrated Muslim terrorist Barack Hussein Obama:

The daughter of President John F. Kennedy endorsed Democratic presidential candidate Barack Obama, saying he could inspire Americans in the same way her father once did.


"I have never had a president who inspired me the way people tell me that my father inspired them," Caroline Kennedy wrote in an op-ed posted Saturday on the Web site of The New York Times. "But for the first time, I believe I have found the man who could be that president — not just for me, but for a new generation of Americans."

How are we supposed to take this seriously? The Kennedys are a notoriously hard-partying family who've shacked up with every "thespian" with a decent set of cans who's made her way to Hollywood for the past 50 years, and National Virtue has been paying the price for their drunken misbehavior ever since. Quite frankly, I wish "Ms" Kennedy would stick with the usual antics of the heiress set, like wrecking their Bentleys and flashing their coochies at the paparazzi in front of Hyde. Besides, I thought Al Gore had locked up the support of the drunken starlet crowd. Until young Hollywood is ready to repent for their sins and endorse Republicans (other than Rudy Giuliani & John McCain), their words will remain so much hollow, self-serving claptrap. Praise Him!