Your Hate Parade

New Year's Day is when Our Nation's metaphorical testes drop, much like the Times Square ball, and we renew our committment to manliness through such brutishly heterosexual pursuits as resolving to improve our figures, sipping mimosas at brunch, and watching beauty queens wave from floats covered in rose petals. Disrupting this cycle of masculinity would make The Left happier than Pajama Boy at the Lancome counter at Macy's. Unsurprisingly, their minions are hard at work raining The Gay down on our parade:

Anti-LGBT activists and other right-wing conservatives are calling for a boycott of the 2014 Rose Parade because of a parade float that will feature the wedding of a same-sex couple.

CBS Los Angeles reported on Monday that Aubrey Loots and Danny LeClair plan to formalize their partnership of 12 years atop a float sponsored by the AIDS Health Foundation in this year’s parade.

The two will be the first same-sex couple to get married in the parade. On its Facebook Page, the foundation announced that the two men will be married on top of a float made of thousands of flowers shaped into a white wedding cake. The float will be one of 45 featured in this year’s Rose Parade, a tradition that dates back 125 years.

The depths to which these people will sink to further their perverted agenda is truly appalling. Not only are they mocking the Sacred institution of marriage, but they're even defiling our Holiest pastries! I'm pretty sure the Freedom of assembly guarantees me the right not to see two dudes kissing when I go to a parade. If radical homosexual activists insist on pushing their agenda down our throats, they shouldn't be surpised to find out how resoundingly unpopular it really is. Praise Him!