Edicts of Nancy

The blogosphere's most persecuted Christian!

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Prayer circle jamboree

Conchita wined & dined the staff of the Beauty Palace at the Weiland Brewery today for our "Holiday" lunch, so I'm a bit full and kind of sleepy. I made it a point to order the grilled ham & cheese sandwich, lest anyone confuse which holiday I was actually celebrating. Sadly, this symbolic gesture, as well as my attempts to lead my coworkers in Grace, went unnoticed beneath the chatter and the Johnny Cash on the p.a.. While I digest the garlic fries (sorry, Jesus!), I leave you with the wisdom of my Prayer Warriors.

Lashawn Barber focuses her typically razor-sharp gaze on the two "sort-of related" phenomena responsible for feminizing America: illegal immigration and John McCain's anti-torture bill. Lashawn's point, for those of you unfamiliar with her lyrically elliptical style, is that real men harass illegal immigrants AND insert glowsticks into the rectums of suspected terrorists.

Over at Townhall, Chuck Colson warns us of the latest plank of the Homosexual Agenda: imprisoning Christians in mental hospitals!

It may sound extreme, but this is the beginning of a process that has long been popular with tyrants. In the Soviet Union, Christians were sent by the hundreds of thousands to mental institutions. The state was officially atheist, so if you believe that there was a God, you were insane. And it’s still a wonderful tool for oppressors in places like China and North Korea. ...

But if the day should come that opposition to homosexual conduct is labeled homophobia, and homophobia labeled delusional, then it is a very short step to saying that belief in the Bible, which labels that conduct sinful, is also a mental disorder.

I don't think it's too far a stretch to predict we'll end up as inmates in Pottery Barn's Chinese-style work camps, where we toil night and day applying distressed finishes to their armoires and sidetables.

Agape Press is horrified to learn that Wal-Mart is trying to market their brand of economy-depressing wages to the nancies. Don Wildmon predicts that it is simply a matter of time before Wal-Mart extends benefits like advising how to file for taxpayer-subsidized health insurance to the domestic partners of its employees.

Also at Agape Press, "Plain" Jane Jimenez says that the best Christmas gift parents can give their children is two differently-sexed married parents (try overstock.com). Second best, of course, is a genuine Edicts of Nancy thong.


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