Notes from the underground

Speech after long silence; it is right, or so wrote some radical homosexual activist, presumably between leaving bitchy comments about why a Christian isn't fit to be Miss America on his homo friends' blogs. Greetings from the newest captive nation, Christians, and please forgive my lack of posting. It seems the nation I once loved since I last posted has been turned into a ruthless police state, one held in line by the truncheons of ACORN, Big Arugula, and Katie Couric.

The speed at which Obama's tyranny has become so omnipresent is truly startling. I took the mighty Praisemobile in for an oil change and they wanted to rotate the tires. Socialism! Worse is the subliminal, pro-Obama messages ADP is printing on my paystubs: Run "your taxable income for this period is $2246.37" through an Enigma machine and you'll get "Teach your child his anus is the eighth Wonder of the World."

But possibly the worst of all was the incessant homosexual indoctrination I received while protesting a botany class this spring. It was one insult against Taste and Decency after another, but the final straw for me came during the lecture on monocots (I have no idea either), when the instructor said, "That white stuff that's stuck in your teeth after you eat corn on the cob? That's endosperm."

Well, something in me just snapped: "Good God! Who does your lesson planning, Barney Frank?" And I stormed out, never to return. I've been living a life of quiet desperation ever since, eking out a meager existence back at Conchita's Unisex Beauty Palace, and wondering when, if ever, I would return to political activism for movement conservatism. Christians, I believe that day has come.

One of the ways The Left is destroying Our Nation is through their everyone's a winner/nobody's a loser mollycoddling of delinquents and retards in our public schools. The results of this disastrous approach are evident in the higher incidences of venereal disease and voter identification with the Democrat Party. Now it's compromising the election results in Iran:

Iran's interior ministry said Saturday President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was far ahead with nearly 80 percent of all votes counted, but his pro-reform rival countered that he was the clear victor and warned of possible fraud in the election.

If you ask me, this demonstrates the close working relationship between The Left and Islamic terrorists more than your average Hollywood awards ceremony. What do you want to bet the teachers' union engineered this whole thing? Christians, if we don't want the same thing to happen here, it's imperative that you homeschool your children, before they're converted into gay Iranians. Praise Him!