The continuing crusade

The shape of the crescent is offensive to our God, as was made evident by His recent destruction of "Crescent City." Naturally I am delighted that Heartland values triumphed over the unholy union of landscape architects and militant Islamists, though I still worry for the future of our Republic. White children still risk being exposed to this graven image on calendars, on suitcases, in breakfast cereals, and utility bills. Sharpen those pencils, my fellow Christian fuss-budgets, for our work is hardly finished.